"Friend Me"
tonight, i am sitting here intending on a good rambling. babbling about nothing, just to see what comes out..thinking, thinking...think with me, please? i need some assistance. thank you, no wonderpets, okay mommies?
"this one time, at band camp"...okay, so i never took band. much less attended band camp..but 'band camp' are two words i can never hear again, without picturing that red head chic, from "how i met your mother". a show which i find quirky, warm fuzzy, sarcastic, trivial and thought provoking all in one. not an easy combo to pull off with such ease. but, the writers and actors do it beautifully. i watch it once in awhile. (hmmm. maybe i am blogging about tv? weird). the friendships on the show are solid and lasting. i have always been quick to say goodbye in a friendship. even though most of my friends i have known for 10+ years...i wonder sometimes, if it has to do with being a brat. my family moved frequently as a result of air force life. i was accustomed to moving from place to place. there was NEVER a new kid in class--ALL of us were the "new kid". most families moved about. unpacking, arranging, meeting and greeting. forming bonds with people that we knew may just "fly out" at any moment. sharing our lives with others, just to up and move out of them. it was typical. it was normal. once my dad retired and we relocated to be near family, i met people that have never been out of the state. sometimes, even out of the county. it was a bizarre new world. i remember the first day of 5th grade. i was nervous and shy, typical melinda stuff. i glanced up from the staring contest i was having with my desk to notice something unnerving. everybody was looking at me. EVERYBODY. obviously, that made me even more self conscious but i gave a slight smile, wondering if my clothes looked funny or my hair. by the end of the day, I understood the stares. apparently, i was an odd ball, the new kid, from alaska. "did you live in an igloo? does alaska have trees?" questions, questions. i understood, but i was so painfully shy, answering was scary stuff. after a long, emotionally draining, first day and eager for dismissal, i noticed a folded piece of paper on my desk. it read," hi, you are new here. i have been here a long time. i can show you the ropes. i am danny. i will help you. i am wearing the green shirt." i let out a giggle and looked up trying to locate this kind classmate. well, he wasn't the only one wearing green. it took a few days to figure out who was who, but, i did finally met him --and thanked him for his kindness. anywho. (see this blog is free flowing, with no direction, so don't bother to stop and for any or consult mapquest, because there are no landmarks to guide you. anyways.) so, joining the civilian life was a shocker in many ways. base living to rural country living. no id check points. no one pulling over to salute the flag when the anthem was played over loud speakers. and my new home had mountains, horses, pigs, cows. and moonshine, but that's another blog, another time. i have wondered if people that knew each other early in their lives, like the classmates i met back '85, still remained friends. and if they did, why? was it based on a shared history or did people that stay rooted in one place have more friends? or, better friendships? was i so weird or cold to float about, gaining and losing friends so easily? as a child moving a lot, sometimes we would take an address or two, sometimes write. but, it was easy to forget to follow through, though not intentionally. even now, when someone says, "i was thinking about you the other day." I am always shocked. i always, wonder why. unless you are my mom, of course! haha. or wendy. because i know you two have an unnatural obsession with my life. (hahahaha.) i think, the people i meet, i meet for a purpose. we guide one another, learn from one another. so, all past friendships, i value. although i am notoriously bad about keeping in touch, I do appreciate my friends. even the ones i have lost touch with, whether it was my inability, or unwillingness to pick up a phone, or just the natural ebb and flow friends...i regret losing touch with people. i know i suck it that regard, i KNOW i do. but, at the same time, despite my social inadequacies, i treasure the moments shared. the laughs. the singing loudly and poorly, when people are looking, the rain puddle fights, the rebellions of good intentions and mischief... literally rolling on the floor laughing. it took a few years, but now, i can finally refer to va as home. and i understand now, forever friendship have less to do with proximity and more to do with emotional distance. a willingness to grow together, notice and rejoice in the changes together. not letting the trials of life separate, with a slow, steady drift out to sea.
okay, so this blog is about friendship. hmm. my friends may go... and sometimes, return ...thankfully, the memories made keep me grounded and aware of life. the good stuff.
babbling. babbling. babbling.
the blog point for those lost in my run-on sentences and my sentimental tidlewave:
friendship = good.
bragging about things done at band camp = bad.
sincerely, your, never-gonna-call-you- but love-you-to-pieces, friend,
melinda. or mindy. or mindyrat. or mamabear...depending on the decade!
p.s.
i am trying to do better: to all the friends that have known me for eons, and love me anyway, thank you!! i love you right back!!
Posted by Mama Bear at 1/14/2010 10:37 PM 
Categories: I Was Thinkin'
Tags: muskrats rule brat life military life friendships
Categories: I Was Thinkin'
Tags: muskrats rule brat life military life friendships
http://www.bradanderson.net/poetry_htm/bits.html
i thought of this poem right away. i hope it works okay. if not, i'll type it in later.
L
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thanks for the poem, L!
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My obsession with your life is unnatural? I thought I was normal. hmm haha
Do I know Danny?
I find it so interesting .. your perspective on growing up.. moving that sort of thing. I was one of those kids that never moved. My family thought it was weird that I moved over to the next mountain when I grew up. 30minute drive, and I heard "What are you doing way over there?"
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HAHA! i was completely kidding--i have to be, right??? particularly since,i am equally obsessed with your life
and now, as adults, you have moved many times, i am planted--which i NEVER thought i'd be! well, first it was the next mountain, now another state or two! they miss you, because you're wonderful! (what a sweet question!)
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